Saturday, 17 September 2016


At the pub, and I walk into the toilets. Like an unexpected slap in the face, my boyfriend's ex is looking at me with pure hatred in her eyes. I'm shocked; it's like I've walked into a physical barrier. My body's gone into fight or flight mode. I sidestep into the nearest cubicle. All the happy alcohol-and-friends feeling has leaked away and I'm conscious of my own heartbeat. I go to the loo and when I come out she's gone and left the pub and I feel like I've just avoided being stabbed or something.

There's nothing I can do, is there? It's too far gone to ever try and smooth things out between us. I've become someone's enemy. It's a difficult thought to stomach.


  1. This is a simple matter of jealousy, and love makes jealous fools of us all. You have what she wants, and judging by your first post it's been at least a year since they split? This isn't someone she ever wanted to let go by the sounds of it, and she probably felt exactly the same fight-or-flight response as you (I like how you described this by the way- hit the nail on the head.) All you can do is give each other space. I wouldn't go so far to avoid every place she goes to, but with each accidental meeting it should be easier and the fire should simmer down.

    The only thing jealousy is capable of doing is making you feel bad, ruining your relationships or filling your heart with hatred. This is something she needs to get over by herself, so just leave her to it. Your boyfriend's with you- you've won essentially- so just put her out of your mind completely and enjoy you own life.

    1. A sensible older lady21 September 2016 at 19:55

      Exactly this! Don't waste time on silly drama like you're in high school. Just be an adult about it and nobody can ever say a word against you. Kill them with kindness, that's what I say!

    2. Anonymous and Sensible Older Lady, you have made my evening! There was so much drama last year, and then it's been lovely and quiet since. I don't enjoy drama like a lot of girls my age seem to, so I will take your good advice and keep well away. Thank you for your advice.